The Purpose Driven Word of God

Exerpts from a cool new Bible translation:

AC 2:42 And they were continually devoting themselves to the apostles' new bestsellers and to small group meetings, to the eating of Krispy Kreme donuts in the church foyer and to contemplative spirituality.

AC 2:43 And everyone kept feeling the bass from the praise and worship rock band; and many video clips and light shows were taking place through the apostles. 44 And all those who had believed were together at three different services, and had casual attire in common; 45 and they began selling their stocks and bonds, and were giving the proceeds to the building campaign, as the church might have need. 46 And day by day continuing with one vision in the new million-dollar sanctuary, and sending church mailers from house to house, they were having celebration dinners together with gladness and self-esteem in the heart, 47 praising God, and finding favor with all the people‘s felt needs. And the Lord (along with Peter, the original inventor of perpetual revival) was adding to their number day by day those who were finding purpose.

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