Monday, January 30, 2006

I needed a place to post stuff.

So for my first post, I thought I'd post my findings on my Jungian Typology (aka briggs-myer) personality profile after being inspired by Matt Whitman's craziness. Interesting stuff, though not an exact science (what ever that means), but I thought it would be a pretty good place to start if you want to know me or if I want to know myself for that matter. It's crazy long and mostly for my own sake, but read as much as you would like (or all depending on how much you love me) and you can follow the links to check out your own self.

Funny side note:
Danica and I have the exact same personality type (go figure).
Justin and I have the two contrasting/complementary types that supposedly make for the most compatible, strongest and lasting relationships (already knew that, but Justin doesn't care).
Kelsi and I have the two that supposedly don't make a bit of sense together but somehow often work at times and can be enjoyable (the enigma - one that is puzzling, ambiguous, or inexplicable).

Your Type is





Strength of the preferences %





Qualitative analysis of your type formula

You are:

  • slightly expressed extrovert
  • moderately expressed intuitive personality
  • moderately expressed feeling personality
  • moderately expressed perceiving personality

The Portrait of the Champion Idealist (eNFp)

The Champion Idealists are abstract in thought and speech, cooperative in accomplishing their aims, and informative and extraverted when relating with others. For Champions, nothing occurs which does not have some deep ethical significance, and this, coupled with their uncanny sense of the motivations of others, gives them a talent for seeing life as an exciting drama, pregnant with possibilities for both good and evil. This type is found in only about 3 percent of the general population, but they have great influence because of their extraordinary impact on others. Champions are inclined to go everywhere and look into everything that has to do with the advance of good and the retreat of evil in the world. They can't bear to miss out on what is going on around them; they must experience, first hand, all the significant social events that affect our lives. And then they are eager to relate the stories they've uncovered, hoping to disclose the "truth" of people and issues, and to advocate causes. This strong drive to unveil current events can make them tireless in conversing with others, like fountains that bubble and splash, spilling over their own words to get it all out.

Champions consider intense emotional experiences as being vital to a full life, although they can never quite shake the feeling that a part of themselves is split off, uninvolved in the experience. Thus, while they strive for emotional congruency, they often see themselves in some danger of losing touch with their real feelings, which Champions possess in a wide range and variety. In the same vein, Champions strive toward a kind of spontaneous personal authenticity, and this intention always to "be themselves" is usually communicated nonverbally to others, who find it quite attractive. All too often, however, Champions fall short in their efforts to be authentic, and they tend to heap coals of fire on themselves, berating themselves for the slightest self-conscious role-playing.

Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving
by Marina Margaret Heiss

[The following comes partially from the archetype, but mostly from my own dealings with ENFPs.]

General: ENFPs are both "idea"-people and "people"-people, who see everyone and everything as part of an often bizarre cosmic whole. They want to both help (at least, their own definition of "help") and be liked and admired by other people, on bo th an individual and a humanitarian level. They are interested in new ideas on principle, but ultimately discard most of them for one reason or another.

Social/Personal Relationships: ENFPs have a great deal of zany charm, which can ingratiate them to the more stodgy types in spite of their unconventionality. They are outgoing, fun, and genuinely like people. As SOs/mates they are warm, affectionate (l ots of PDA), and disconcertingly spontaneous. However, attention span in relationships can be short; ENFPs are easily intrigued and distracted by new friends and acquaintances, forgetting about the older ones for long stretches at a time. Less mature ENFPs may need to feel they are the center of attention all the time, to reassure them that everyone thinks they're a wonderful and fascinating person.

ENFPs often have strong, if unconvential, convictions on various issues related to their Cosmic View. They usually try to use their social skills and contacts to persuade people gently of the rightness of these views; his sometimes results in their negle cting their nearest and dearest while flitting around trying to save the world.
Work Environment: ENFPs are pleasant, easygoing, and usually fun to work with. They come up with great ideas, and are a major asset in brainstorming sessions. Followthrough tends to be a problem, however; they tend to get bored quickly, especially if a newer, more interesting project comes along. They also tend to be procrastinators, both about meeting hard deadlines and about performing any small, uninteresting tasks that they've been assigned. ENFPs are at their most useful when working in a group w ith a J or two to take up the slack.

ENFPs hate bureaucracy, both in principle and in practice; they will always make a point of launching one of their crusades against some aspect of it.

Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving

by Joe Butt

ENFPs are friendly folks. Most are really enjoyable people. Some of the most soft-hearted people are ENFPs.

ENFPs have what some call a "silly switch." They can be intellectual, serious, all business for a while, but whenever they get the chance, they flip that switch and become CAPTAIN WILDCHILD, the scourge of the swimming pool, ticklers par excellence. Som etimes they may even appear intoxicated when the "switch" is flipped.

One study has shown that ENFPs are significantly overrepresented in psychodrama. Most have a natural propensity for role-playing and acting.

ENFPs like to tell funny stories, especially about their friends. This penchant may be why many are attracted to journalism. I kid one of my ENFP friends that if I want the sixth fleet to know something, I'll just tell him.

ENFPs are global learners. Close enough is satisfactory to the ENFP, which may unnerve more precise thinking types, especially with such things as piano practice ("three quarter notes or four ... what's the difference?") Amazingly, some ENFPs are adept at exacting disciplines such as mathematics.

Friends are what life is about to ENFPs, moreso even than the other NFs. They hold up their end of the relationship, sometimes being victimized by less caring individuals. ENFPs are energized by being around people. Some have real difficulty being alone , especially on a regular basis.

One ENFP colleague, a social worker, had such tremendous interpersonal skills that she put her interviewers at ease during her own job interview. She had the ability to make strangers feel like old friends.

ENFPs sometimes can be blindsided by their secondary Feeling function. Hasty decisions based on deeply felt values may boil over with unpredictable results. More than one ENFP has abruptly quit a job in such a moment.

Functional Analysis:

Extraverted iNtuition

The physical world, both geos and kosmos, is the ENFP's primary source of information. Rather than sensing things as they are, dominant intuition is sensitive to things as they might be. These extraverted intuitives are most adept with patterns and connections. Their natural inclination is toward relationships, especially among people or living things.

Intuition leans heavily on feeling for meaning and focus. Its best patterns reflect the interesting points of people, giving rise to caricatures of manner, speech and expression.

Introverted Feeling

Auxiliary feeling is nonverbally implied more often than it is openly expressed. When expressed, this logic has an aura of romance and purity that may seem out of place in this flawed, imperfect world. In its own defense, feeling judgement frequently and fleetly gives way to humor. ENFPs who publicize their feelings too often may put off some of the crowd of friends they naturally attract.

Extraverted Thinking

Thinking, the process which runs to impersonal conclusions, holds the extraverted tertiary position. Used on an occasional basis, ENFPs may benefit greatly from this ability. Less mature and lacking the polish of higher order functions, Thinking is not well suited to be used as a prominent function. As with other FP types, the ENFP unwary of Thinking's limitations may find themselves most positively mistaken.

Introverted Sensing

Sensing, the least discernible ENFP function, resides in the inner world where reality is reduced to symbols and icons--ideas representing essences of external realities. Under the influence of the ever-present intuition, the ENFP's sensory perceptions are in danger of being replaced by hypothetical data consistent with pattern and paradigm. When it is protected and nourished, introverted sensing provides information about the fixed. From such firm anchoring ENFPs are best equipped to launch into thousands of plausibilities and curiosities yet to be imagined.

Perhaps the combination of introverted Feeling and childlike introverted Sensing is responsible for the silent pull of ENFPs to the wishes of parents, authority figures and friends. Or perhaps it's the predominance of indecisive intuition in combination with the ambiguity of secondary Fi and tertiary Te that induces these kind souls to capitulate even life-affecting decisions. Whatever the dynamic, ENFPs are strongly influenced by the opinions of their friends.

Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, ENFP's natural partner is the INTJ, or the INFJ. ENFP's dominant function of Extraverted Intuition is best matched with a partner whose dominant function is Introverted Intuition.

Famous ENFPs:

Franz Joseph Haydn
Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain)
Will Rogers
Buster Keaton
Charles Dickens
Theodor "Dr." Seuss Geisel
Bill Moyers
Bill Cosby
Robin Williams
Sandra Bullock
Robert Downey Jr.
Alicia Silverstone
James Woods
John Kerry
Lewis Black
Andy Kaufman
Regis Philbin
Joan Baez
Carl Rogers
Molly Brown
Newland Archer (from Edith Wharton's The Age of Innocence)


Discoverer Advocate: ENFP

Theme is inspiration, both of themselves and others. Talents lie in grasping profound significance, revealing truths, and motivating others. Very perspective of others' hidden motives and purposes. Interested in everything about individual and their stories as long as they are genuine. Contagious enthusiasm for "causes" that further good and develop latent potential and the same zeal for discovering dishonesty and inauthenticity. Frequently moved to enthusiastically communicate their "message."

ENFP types can inspire and energize any group of people. Their enthusiasm for new ways of doing things is often very contagious. They never tire of coming up with original possibilities, which are usually insightful or even ingenious.

Choosing a Major

  • May declare many majors until one captures their imagination
  • Tend to be happy in majors or careers where they can initiate new ideas that others will implement
  • Found frequently in counseling, teaching, the arts, journalism, advertising, sales


  • Usually involved in campus social life
  • Like floormates to gather together for impromptu games or discussions, even at exam time
  • Report they have no trouble dating once a week or more
  • Motto might be "Work must be fun"

Learning Style

  • Material must stimulate their imagination
  • Impulsive energy may lead them to get involved in one project after another, sometimes not finishing them
  • Enjoy complexity and abstractions
  • Express themselves well, especially spontaneously
  • Like variety in classes, subjects, majors, and tests

Possible Causes of Stress

  • May like to test the limits of college rules--and sometimes push too far
  • Among college females, tend to be the most assertive of the types
  • May "burn out" or develop physical problems because of trying to do it all
  • May not finish projects if they don't care enough about the topic
  • May say "yes" to anything interesting with little sense of priority

Reading, Writing, Studying

  • Dislike uninspired routine and may avoid necessary details
  • Like to study in groups but sometimes find that nothing gets done
  • May read anything; tend to have piles of books and magazines around
  • Write quickly when inspired, dashing off a first draft after "talking out" the paper
  • Must push themselves to rewrite a second or later draft, and usually benefit from editing the first one for organization, missing logic and data

Dealing with Stress

  • Naturally good at getting things done at the last minute with a burst of energy
  • Natural versatility and openness to change helps reduce stress
  • Must find some time to be alone
  • Learn to set priorities and say "no" to some requests
  • Need to pay attention to physical needs


Giving Life an Extra Squeeze

ENFPs are generally described as dynamic, enthusiastic, highly skilled with people, affirming, and gregarious. The combined preferences of Extraversion, Intuition, Feeling, and Perceiving give them an exceptional capacity for dealing with a variety of people, events, or challenges--often simultaneously.

ENFPs prefer to perceive the world through its possibilities (N) and translate these possibilities inter- and intrapersonally (F). All this takes place in lively interaction with the outside world (E), and their Perceiving attitude (P) keeps them open to a never-ending flow of alternatives in any situation.

The ENFP has a high need to be affirming of others--and to be affirmed. This drives them in such a way that they may appear overly positive, even insincere, in praise of other people's simplest deeds. Craving such affirmations, ENFPs will overexert themselves--physically and psychologically--to please. They may also expend extra energy giving strokes to everyone and trying, at times desperately, to get strokes in return. It is not uncommon for ENFPs to work themselves into exhaustion while following an inspiration or seeking an approving response from someone important to them.

This ability to see the potential in people and be positive about them gives ENFPs a decided edge in interpersonal dynamics, especially when combined with their almost psychic awareness of what's going on with people around them. Sometimes in their Extraverted enthusiasm, however, they may share some of these Intuitive insights and be so accurate as to be intimidating rather than helpful to the people involved. These unsolicited but freely offered insights can often win them disapproval rather than approval, although that may only make the ENFP try harder the next around.

Because of their enthusiasm for life, it is easy for ENFPs to rally support around any number of exciting ideas or causes. Unfortunately, somewhat like their first cousin, the ENTP, ENFPs make more starts than finishes. So while a crowd may be attracted by an ENFP's charisma, it may soon grow frustrated by the lack organization and follow-through.

Gender differences can be significant for males because the qualities most associated with ENFPs are more traditionally attributed to females: sociability, desire/need to please, intuition, spontaneity, and concern for other people. As a result, when an ENFP male "plays" into those natural preferences of his personality, he can find himself outside the male "establishment." Ironically, this may set him up to overcompensate and behave in ways atypical for ENFPs--to be, for example, competitive or overly argumentative. Seeking group approval, he may get involved with contact sports or other "tough" activities, though he would really prefer to be elsewhere. ENFP males, somewhat more than other F males, may also fall into the trap of physical seduction as a way of establishing their masculinity. Indeed, both male and female ENFPs can be intellectually and physically seductive.

By virtue of their enthusiasm and generally accepting nature, ENFPs are highly resistant to categorizing and "putting people in boxes," and they are equally resistant to being put in boxes themselves, since they enjoy their own multifaceted personalities. With a little bit of effort they can "get into another person's moccasins" and identify with that individual's thoughts and feelings so readily that they run the risk of virtually losing their own identity. This beautiful quality of effortlessly taking on both the characteristics and the problems of another type is seen by others as very supportive and accepting. However, it can become a problem to the degree that it leaves ENFPs adrift, wondering who they are what they should be doing. Obviously, this tendency has a restlessness to it, as well as an unfinished quality that haunts ENFPs lifelong.

In a relationship, ENFPs are rarely complacent. While highly committed, they can never give up thinking that either "This relationship could be better if I worked harder" or "There's a better relationship, still out there waiting for me." Such ambiguity and tension can be disconcerting for mates who are of a different type, particularly Judgers and most especially Sensing-Thinking-Judgers.

Parenting is fun for the ENFP and with the ENFP. The home, while often not the world's neatest, is a playground for fun, creative explorations. "The more the merrier" is the theme and each person and his or her differences must be affirmed. Expression, affirmation, and growth happen all the time. All life is a party and so even family chores must be converted to play in order to be worth accomplishing. If there is a family or individual job to do, it must either be put off (if it is boring) or involve others (so it becomes fun). The ENFP home is a gathering place for the neighborhood and friends. If the children are not ENFPs, they may not only misunderstand such a social whirl, they may also be confused or affronted by their parents' "immature," childlike behavior.

The basic theme of the ENFP's life is self-expression. The 1960s emphasis on self-awareness and group dynamics, the conversation pits where talk of peace and love and "flower power" took place, epitomize the values of the ENFP. The more that people can be themselves--and be affirmed for being themselves--the more growing they will do and the more they will contribute to the good of society. ENFPs believe that and will give their energies to help others achieve their goals. It's possible, however, for their enthusiasm to lead them in so many directions simultaneously that they can squander their best intentions, leading to frustration and self-punishment.

Obviously, relaxation--even in play--does not come easily to ENFPs. In fact, they almost have to "work at it." ENFPs go in fits and starts, and so when they become excited, they lose all sense of time, physical needs, and anything else. They follow their enthusiasm until totally fatigued, then collapse. As a result, relaxation, unless as part of a creative adventure, may take a backseat, sometimes even at the expense of the ENFP's physical well-being.

As children, ENFPs are delight and yet often thoroughly exhausting and exasperating to parents. Everything around is material for daydreaming about who they are and might be. So an upright vacuum cleaner becomes a radio microphone and the ENFP is a disk jockey. Tomorrow, a tree house will be built, and the ENFP is an architect, artist, painter, or interior decorator. Still another day, he or she may be program director for a large playground, responsible for many activities. All of this, while exciting for the ENFP, may be something of a merry-go-round for the parent, as the ENFP solicits parental approval and help in implementing each of these activities. While desperately wanting such approval, ENFP children, in their enthusiasm, can sometimes do things in direct conflict with the affirmation they're seeking: talking incessantly instead of listening, for example, or losing something they were entrusted not to lose, messing up their rooms in the name of straightening, or coming home later than promised.

In their quest to be liked, ENFP children are hypersensitive to the criticism of others, especially playmates. With a tendency to personalize everything, they are easily crushed by a harsh remark, so that their trademark phrase could be: "Everyone is so mean to me!"

ENFPs approach learning as they do everything else: it is a creative adventure that, if done well, will bring affirmation. They may be the ultimate apple-polishers. They want to be liked and they want to like the teacher, their classmates, the school, the administration, and everything else. As Extraverted-Intuitive-Feelers, they generally do well academically and are people-pleasers. Interestingly, more than other types, they may suffer test phobias, because even though those who do very well in class and know the material feel boxed in by fact-oriented exams that only have one "right" answer. On the other hand, they do well on essay tests, which give them the opportunity to integrate their knowledge into a bigger picture.

Family events for ENFPs are parties. If they are not, the ENFP will make them so. The Irish wake was probably designed by an ENFP who preferred to celebrate a life than mourn a death. One of the beauties of ENFPs is their ability to take an orginary family event and, with almost no planning, using only the people and materials at hand, convert the occasion into a virtual work of art, an expression of affection or family affirmation that will be long remembered.

In this and many other ways, ENFPs are great improvisers. In the pursuit of pleasing others, their capabilities can be boundless. They may, for example, reach into the refrigerator and pull out whatever is at hand, and transform it into an impressive, spontaneous dinner, served with artistic flair. While this is clearly admirable, they still have a tendency to be hypercritical of their own performance. So after the dishes are done, they may decide that the dinner would have been better had they only, say, planned a day earlier, or remembered to defrost the brownies. Such "what-if" speculation can haunt ENFPs, turning otherwise successful occasions into opportunities for needless self-criticism.

For the ENFP, work, too, must be play or it is probably not worth doing. Worthwhile tasks are those that affirm and enlarge the self and involve more fun than drudgery. Like other EPs, ENFPs have a great deal of difficulty settling on just one career, for three reasons: They truly believe they can do most anything any want; the search for ever new fields to master is always more fun than remaining in a career already conquered; and they usually can do almost anything they set their minds to. Unfortunately, their career choices, like so many other things, may result from trying to please others. To please parents, for example, ENFPs may find themselves in careers involving the kinds of skills that, over the long haul, may become frustrating or stressful for them. They generally find more satisfaction and greater rewards in psychology, teaching, and theology, than in such fields as engineering or accounting. As managers, they are far more advocates and mentors than "bosses," believing that their role is to help everyone achieve their individual goals.

Summary - ENFP

Contributions to the Organization

· Initiate change

· Focus on the possibilities, especially for people

· Energize others through their contagious enthusiasm

· Originate projects and actions

· Appreciate others

Leadership Style

· Lead with energy and enthusiasm

· Like to be in charge of the start-up phase

· Communicate and often become spokespersons for values relating to people

· Work to include and support others

· Pay attention to what motivates others

Preferred Work Environment

· Contains imaginative people focused on human possibilities

· Colorful

· Participative atmosphere

· Offers variety and challange

· Idea-oriented

· Unconstrained

· Lively

Potential Pitfalls

· May move onto new ideas or projects without completing those already started

· May overlook relevant details

· May overextend and try to do too much

· May procratinate

Suggestions for Development

· May need to set priorities and develop follow-through

· May need to focus on important details

· May need to learn to screen projects rather than trying to do all that is initially appealing

· May need to learn and apply time management skills

Order of Mental Preferences

1. Intuition

2. Feeling

3. Thinking

4. Sensing

ENFPs are outgoing and talkative types who often have many diverse friends. They are naturally irreverent, curious, good with words, creative, and even a bit artsy. They favor abstraction over detail and tend to flit from one activity to the next, deriving more pleasure from starting projects than from finishing them.

ENFPs at work

ENFPs, NFs, are interested in many different things and this often leads them in multiple directions, therefore they are known for changing jobs and even careers frequently. ENFPs prefer to make work fun and have been known to put off work when there is a chance to have fun. ENFPs prefer environments which have little administrative or detailed work. Delegation to reliable support staff is important for success. ENFPs seek out jobs not confined by strict schedules and mundane tasks. According to Keirsey, the "Idealists" want to make the world a better place to live by helping others and are on a search for their "true self". Integrity, ideals, beliefs, and values matter to ENFPs.

Common careers for ENFPs are those which allow flexibility and spontaneity while serving others. This includes teaching, general practice of medicine, medical research, religious fields, entrepreneurship, missionary work, social work, community development, creative arts, broadcasting, consulting, coaching, corporate training, public relations, counseling, advertising, and marketing.

ENFPs in relationships


ENFPs are energized by being around people. ENFPs take their relationships very seriously. ENFPs seek and demand authenticity and depth in their personal relationships, and will put forth a lot of effort into making things work out. ENFPs are generally warm, considerate, affirming, nurturing, and highly invested in the health of the relationship. ENFPs have excellent interpersonal skills, and are able to inspire and motivate others to be the best that they can be. ENFPs are generally highly valued for their genuine warmth and high ideals.

ENFPs want to help, be liked, and admired by other people on both an individual and a humanitarian level. ENFPs hold up their end of relationships, sometimes being victimized by less caring individuals.


Often the ENFP is reluctant to share intimate feelings unless in the company of deeply trusted relationships. Some ENFPs have real difficulty being alone, especially on a regular basis. ENFPs are strongly influenced by the opinions of others. There often appears to be a silent pull of ENFPs to the wishes of authority figures, parents, and friends which may cause a dilemma as to loyalties and decision making. Although energetic and effervescent, the ENFP can sometimes be smothering in their enthusiasm.

How to Behave Toward an ENFP

Give ENFPs the freedom to be flexible. Realize that churning through possibilities inspires their minds and get their creative juices flowing. Don't bog the unsuspecting ENFP down with too many details, especially on any subject not known to be of deep interest to him. Involve the ENFP in the process and try to keep things fun.

Portrait of an ENFP - Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving
(Extraverted Intuition with Introverted Feeling)

The Inspirer

As an ENFP, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you take things in primarily via your intuition. Your secondary mode is internal, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit in with your personal value system.

ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential. They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things. Their enthusiasm lends them the ability to inspire and motivate others, more so than we see in other types. They can talk their way in or out of anything. They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most out of it.

ENFPs have an unusually broad range of skills and talents. They are good at most things which interest them. Project-oriented, they may go through several different careers during their lifetime. To onlookers, the ENFP may seem directionless and without purpose, but ENFPs are actually quite consistent, in that they have a strong sense of values which they live with throughout their lives. Everything that they do must be in line with their values. An ENFP needs to feel that they are living their lives as their true Self, walking in step with what they believe is right. They see meaning in everything, and are on a continuous quest to adapt their lives and values to achieve inner peace. They're constantly aware and somewhat fearful of losing touch with themselves. Since emotional excitement is usually an important part of the ENFP's life, and because they are focused on keeping "centered", the ENFP is usually an intense individual, with highly evolved values.

An ENFP needs to focus on following through with their projects. This can be a problem area for some of these individuals. Unlike other Extraverted types, ENFPs need time alone to center themselves, and make sure they are moving in a direction which is in sync with their values. ENFPs who remain centered will usually be quite successful at their endeavors. Others may fall into the habit of dropping a project when they become excited about a new possibility, and thus they never achieve the great accomplishments which they are capable of achieving.

Most ENFPs have great people skills. They are genuinely warm and interested in people, and place great importance on their inter-personal relationships. ENFPs almost always have a strong need to be liked. Sometimes, especially at a younger age, an ENFP will tend to be "gushy" and insincere, and generally "overdo" in an effort to win acceptance. However, once an ENFP has learned to balance their need to be true to themselves with their need for acceptance, they excel at bringing out the best in others, and are typically well-liked. They have an exceptional ability to intuitively understand a person after a very short period of time, and use their intuition and flexibility to relate to others on their own level.

Because ENFPs live in the world of exciting possibilities, the details of everyday life are seen as trivial drudgery. They place no importance on detailed, maintenance-type tasks, and will frequently remain oblivous to these types of concerns. When they do have to perform these tasks, they do not enjoy themselves. This is a challenging area of life for most ENFPs, and can be frustrating for ENFP's family members.

An ENFP who has "gone wrong" may be quite manipulative - and very good it. The gift of gab which they are blessed with makes it naturally easy for them to get what they want. Most ENFPs will not abuse their abilities, because that would not jive with their value systems.

ENFPs sometimes make serious errors in judgment. They have an amazing ability to intuitively perceive the truth about a person or situation, but when they apply judgment to their perception, they may jump to the wrong conclusions.

ENFPs who have not learned to follow through may have a difficult time remaining happy in marital relationships. Always seeing the possibilities of what could be, they may become bored with what actually is. The strong sense of values will keep many ENFPs dedicated to their relationships. However, ENFPs like a little excitement in their lives, and are best matched with individuals who are comfortable with change and new experiences.

Having an ENFP parent can be a fun-filled experience, but may be stressful at times for children with strong Sensing or Judging tendancies. Such children may see the ENFP parent as inconsistent and difficult to understand, as the children are pulled along in the whirlwind life of the ENFP. Sometimes the ENFP will want to be their child's best friend, and at other times they will play the parental authoritarian. But ENFPs are always consistent in their value systems, which they will impress on their children above all else, along with a basic joy of living.

ENFPs are basically happy people. They may become unhappy when they are confined to strict schedules or mundane tasks. Consequently, ENFPs work best in situations where they have a lot of flexibility, and where they can work with people and ideas. Many go into business for themselves. They have the ability to be quite productive with little supervision, as long as they are excited about what they're doing.

Because they are so alert and sensitive, constantly scanning their environments, ENFPs often suffer from muscle tension. They have a strong need to be independent, and resist being controlled or labelled. They need to maintain control over themselves, but they do not believe in controlling others. Their dislike of dependence and suppression extends to others as well as to themselves.

ENFPs are charming, ingenuous, risk-taking, sensitive, people-oriented individuals with capabilities ranging across a broad spectrum. They have many gifts which they will use to fulfill themselves and those near them, if they are able to remain centered and master the ability of following through.

Jungian functional preference ordering for ENFP:

Dominant: Extraverted Intuition
Auxiliary: Introverted Feeling
Tertiary: Extraverted Thinking
Inferior: Introverted Sensing

ENFP Relationships

ENFPs take their relationships very seriously, but also approach them with a childlike enthusiasm and energy. They seek and demand authenticity and depth in their personal relationships, and will put forth a lot of effort into making things work out. They are warm, considerate, affirming, nurturing, and highly invested in the health of the relationship. They have excellent interpersonal skills, and are able to inspire and motivate others to be the best that they can be. Energetic and effervescent, the ENFP is sometimes smothering in their enthusiasm, but are generally highly valued for their genuine warmth and high ideals.

ENFP Strengths

Most ENFPs will exhibit the following strengths with regards to relationships issues:

  • Good communication skills
  • Very perceptive about people's thought and motives
  • Motivational, inspirational; bring out the best in others
  • Warmly affectionate and affirming
  • Fun to be with - lively sense of humor, dramatic, energetic, optimistic
  • Strive for "win-win" situations
  • Driven to meet other's needs
  • Usually loyal and dedicated to others

ENFP Weaknesses

Most ENFPs will exhibit the following weaknesses with regards to relationship issues:

  • Tendency to be smothering
  • Their enthusiasm may lead them to be unrealistic
  • Uninterested in dealing with "mundane" matters such as cleaning, paying bills, etc.
  • Hold onto bad relationships long after they've turned bad
  • Dislike of conflict
  • Occasional dislike of criticism
  • Don't pay attention to their own needs
  • Constant quest for the perfect relationship may make them change relationships frequently
  • May become bored easily
  • Have difficulty scolding or punishing others

ENFPs as Lovers

"To love means to open ourselves to the negative as well as the positive - to grief, sorrow, and disappointment as well as to joy, fulfillment, and an intensity of consciousness we did not know was possible before." -- Rollo May

ENFPs make warm, considerate, passionate partners who are generally willing, eager, and able to do whatever it takes to make The Relationship a positive place to be. They are enthusiastic, idealistic, focused on other people's feelings, and very flexible. These attributes combine to make them especially interested in positive personal relationships, and also makes them very able to promote strong relationships in fun and creative ways. ENFPs take their commitments very seriously, and are generally deeply loyal and faithful to their partners.

There are a couple of difficult relationship areas for the ENFP. The first problem is that many ENFPs have a problem leaving bad relationships. They tend to internalize any problems and take them on their own shoulders, believing that the success or failure of the relationship is their own responsibility. As perfectionists, they don't like to admit defeat, and will stick with bad situations long after they should have left. When they do leave the relationship, they will believe that the failure was their fault, and that there was surely something they could have done to save the relationship.

On the entirely other end of the spectrum, many ENFPs have a difficult time staying focused and following things through to completion. If they have not focused on their ability to follow through, they may have problems staying in dedicated, monogamous relationships. They are so in tune with all of the exciting possibilities of what could be, that they will always fantasize about a greener pasture out there somewhere. If they are not paired with a partner who enjoys new experiences, or who shares their idealistic enthusiasm, the ENFP may become bored. The ENFP who is bored and who is not focused will be very unhappy, and will eventually "leave" the relationship if the problem is not addressed.

Since relationships are central to the ENFP's life, they will be very "hands on" and involved with their intimate relationships. They may be in the habit of constantly asking their partner how they're doing, what they're feeling, etc. This behavior may be a bit smothering, but it also supports a strong awareness of the health (or illness) of the relationship.

Sexually, The ENFP is creative, perfectionistic, playful and affectionate. Their rich fantasy world makes them fun and creative lovers, who usually have new ideas up their sleeves. They whole-heartedly embrace the opportunity for closeness with their mates, believing sexual intimacy to be a positive, fun way to express how much you love each other.

The ENFP needs to be given positive assurance and affirmation. More than one ENFP has been known to "go fishing" for compliments. They like to hear from their significant others that they are loved and valued, and are willing and eager to return the favor. They enjoy lavishing love and affection on their mates, and are creative and energetic in their efforts to please. The ENFP gets a lot of their personal satisfaction from observing the happiness of others, and so is generally determined to please and serve their partners.

A problem area for ENFPs in relationships is their dislike of conflict and sensitivity to criticism. They are perfectionists who believe that any form of criticism is a stab at their character, which is very difficult for them to take. Conflict situations are sources of extreme stress to the ENFP. They have a tendency to brush issues under the rug rather than confront them head-on, if there is likely to be a conflict. They are also prone to "give in" easily in conflict situations, just to end the conflict. They might agree to something which goes against their values just to end the uncomfortable situation. In such cases, the problem is extended and will return at a later time. The ENFP needs to realize that conflict situations are not the end of the world. They are entirely normal, and can be quite helpful for the growth of a relationship. They also need to work on taking criticism for what it is, rather than blowing up any negative comment into an indictment against their entire character.

Generally, the ENFP is a warm and affirming creature who is very interested and able to have an intense, meaningful, close relationship with their mate.

Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, ENFP's natural partner is the INTJ, or the INFJ. ENFP's dominant function of Extraverted Intuition is best matched with a partner whose dominant function is Introverted Intuition.

ENFPs as Friends

ENFPs are warm and sociable people who are keenly in tune with other people's feelings and perspectives. They are energetic and fun to be with. They are very affirming, and get great satisfaction from supporting and lifting up others. They are idealists who seek authenticity in their personal relationships. ENFPs are valued by their peers and confidantes as warm, supportive, giving people.

In the workplace or other casual relationship environments, the ENFP is likely to get along well with almost all other types of people. ENFPs are genuinely interested in people, and are highly perceptive about them, to the point where they're able to understand and relate to all of the personality types with relative ease. They like to see the best in others, and are likely to bring out the best in others. While they are generally accepting of most all people, ENFPs with strong Feeling preferences may have a difficult time understanding people with very strong Thinking preferences who do not respond to the ENFP's enthusiastic warmth. The ENFP will stay open-minded about what they consider a "rejection" by the Thinker, until the situation has repeated itself a few times, in which case the ENFP may shut themselves entirely against the Thinker.

ENFPs may also feel threatened by individuals with strong Judging preferences. With a tendency to take any criticism personally, the ENFP may find themselves irritated or emotional when the Judger expresses a negative opinion, believing somehow that the Judger is expressing disapproval or disappointment in the ENFP.

For close friendships, ENFPs are especially drawn to other iNtuitive Feeling types, and to other Extraverts who are also enthusiastic about life. Like the other iNtuitive Feeling types, the ENFP needs authenticity and depth in their close relationships. They're likely to have friends from all walks of life who they feel close to and care about, but will have only a few very close friends with similar ideals to their own. The ENFP also tends to value the company of iNtuitive Thinkers.

Colorgenics Personality Profile:

At this time you are really feeling quite exhausted by all the conflict and quarrelling that is going on about you and you are looking for some sort of protection from this state of affairs. Ideally you are seeking a peaceful condition and a tranquil environment in which you can be afforded the chance to relax and recover. You seek release from stress and freedom from conflicts and disagreements, of which you seem to have had more than your fair share. But you are taking pains to control the situation by proceeding cautiously and you are right in doing so as you are a very sensitive person.

All of your dreams and hopes have not materialized and consequently you are unsure of which way to go. This uncertainty has led to considerable stress but you have sufficient 'strength of mind' to overcome this state of affairs although it will take some time. You are trying to establish yourself and make an impact despite the fact that everything around you seems to be against you - putting up barriers, but don't be unduly concerned: you have the right ideas and come what may, they will soon be manifested and appreciated. Things are, at this time, OK - but they could be better. You feel that it is essential that you break down any opposition that could possibly lurk in the shadows. You know that you are quite capable of achieving this set goal because you have to and because it is essential to your self-esteem.

You are willing to try anything once. You 'need to be needed' and what is perhaps more important you 'need to need.' You can only feel close to a person or persons when you feel you can trust them, but this trust needs to be proven to you. You feel other people's pain. You feel the need of sympathetic relationships and a pleasant work environment in order to develop and grow. You are an impulsive, loving individual with a great deal of inherent feeling.

You don't really give in. You follow your beliefs and ideals to the bitter end. You are the personification of stubbornness and whatever may transpire, right or wrong, you refuse to compromise or make concessions.

You are demanding and very exacting in the standards you apply to your choice of colleagues and friends --perhaps you demand too much from people. That perfection you seek in a particular person is illusive - perhaps it does not even exist. The way things are at this time it is necessary to 'go slow'. All the pleasures that you have anticipated should be left in abeyance until some future date, but all is not lost, you are able to derive and achieve considerable gratification from someone quite close to you.

The stress and tension that you are experiencing at this time is perhaps due to your inability to achieve security and appreciation from those closest to you. This is resulting in considerable pressures. You find the situation as it stands most frustrating. You are the sort of person that would like to experience all and everything very intensely but unfortunately you are not receiving the warmth and understanding that you feel you are entitled to. Matters are not going too well. You seek a sympathetic ear but it is not forthcoming. This situation is extremely nerve-racking - and what is more humiliating is that no one seems to care and you are powerless to do anything about it.

You are inclined to be too trusting and you feel that you need to be on your guard against the possibility that your endeavors and actions may be misunderstood. Too often you have been taken advantage of and you have been mentally abused. In the past your trusting attitude has often been misunderstood and so you have needed to protect yourself against your tendency to be abused and taken advantage of. As a consequence you possibly adopt an aloof and/or critical attitude and you are only willing to let your guard down once sincerity and trustworthiness can be assured. Now you are seeking a relationship that can provide peace of mind, where you can be yourself and not have the need to put on a false front.

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